What is your conflict repair style?

What you’ll learn about your repair style

Repair attempts can look like humor, reassurance, taking space, or jumping into solutions - each can help or hurt depending on timing. This quiz maps your default moves so you can repair faster and with less guesswork.

You’ll answer in an easy multiple-choice format with 4 options per question and no timer, so you can reflect instead of rushing. Choose your preferred question count and difficulty before starting to match your time and comfort level.

Skills you’ll practice

Recognizing patterns is the first step to changing them. As you play, you’ll practice noticing triggers, naming needs, and choosing repair steps that fit the moment.

• Identifying your “first move” after a disagreement (explain, withdraw, soothe, fix)
• Distinguishing reassurance needs from problem-solving needs
• Timing repairs: when to pause vs when to re-engage
• Using clearer language for accountability and boundaries
• Spotting what helps you feel safe enough to reconnect

Common pitfalls (and how to avoid them)

Many couples get stuck because they use the right repair tool at the wrong time - like offering solutions when your partner wants empathy, or taking space without a clear return plan. Another common snag is assuming your partner’s repair style should match yours, which can turn good intentions into more friction.

How the difficulty stays balanced

This quiz is Mixed difficulty, blending straightforward scenarios with more nuanced, emotionally complex situations. That balance helps you build confidence early while still challenging you to think about context, tone, and follow-through as you progress.